I had an epiphany today that I would like to share with those who care to listen (or read I guess, as this is a written blog and not a verbal one). Well, I was at work (this is not my epiphany) and like most of us experience from time to time, I had to pee. Not just a casual urge mind you, but a real NEED to pee. So, like a lot of us say at a time like this, I too said these oft heard words: "I have to pee like a racehorse". After uttering these words in my mind, as I have numerous other times, it hit me...What in the heck does it mean to pee like a racehorse??? Who in the world started this ridiculous phrase? I myself have never seen a racehorse pee and therefore with no certainty can accurately compare my urgent need to relieve myself with that of the racehorse. Also, whose to say that a racehorse needs to pee at all? Now let's assume that a racehorse does have an immense desire to pee. Does it relieve himself before or after the race? If the rider makes him wait until after the race, does this constitute animal cruelty? That's another topic altogether! Well, to make a long story short, since I have no first hand knowledge of the pee habits of the said racehorse, my epiphany is this: from this point forward, when I have this urge to pee, I will no longer use the racehorse comparison, I will use a comparison that I am all too familiar with. This is the phrase I suggest we all use: "I have to pee like a guy who really, really has to pee!" Now doesn't that make much more sense than that silly phrase we've all been spouting about all this time? I feel like I've stumbled onto something here. Now that I think of it, what about "For Pete's sake" Who is this "Pete" anyway? And why do we care about his "sake"? And what about "get in your two cents worth"? I don't know about you, but the words that come out of my mouth are worth way more than two cents! I think we just go around saying stupid stuff. What have our parents taught us anyway? We don't even know what comes out of our own mouths! We're just a society of stupid phrases that make absolutely no sense. It's time we stop this foolishness and pull ourselves together. So, the next time you find yourself having to pee like a ra.... just remember to tell yourself that you have to pee like a guy who really, really has to pee. You'll be smarter for doing it.
Friday, August 10, 2007
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16 comments:
you really need to see a racehorse pee!!
Wow, you have conviction! You must know a thing or two about peeing racehorses.
I must admit that I am a fan of trite, overused phrases. But really what it comes down to is that I don't want to know about any of your bodily functions PERIOD! so if you have to pee, please leave me out of the loop.
Well, after reading that entire blog, I would say that you definitely gave about 1 cent worth. By the way, the phrase "pee like a racehorse is from the 1960s, it used to be “I have to pee like a Russian racehorse.” In Russia a racehorse’s trainer would tie a string around the horse’s penis an hour or so before the race so that the horse could not urinate. The resulting bladder discomfort would spur the horse to run faster, knowing (presumably from previous training/conditioning) that the string would be removed after the race. At least that is what I was told!
Wow - that's more information than I imagine you wanted! I only found reference to the fact that horses relieve themselves in great quantities! As far as Pete goes, here's what I found:
Biblical origins. Think of St Peter. Think of the omnipresent medieval church and think of hitting your thumb with a hammer. You can't swear, else the local priests will have you up before the Bishop and the Lord alone knows what the outcome of that will be, so you exclaim, in appropriate tone of voice, "For Saint Peter's sake" and carry on erecting the shelves. This phrase was amended to "For Pete's Sake" in later, less religiously oppressive, times.
WOW...I never imagined that my simple midnight rant could spawn such intellectual dialogue. You all impress me, that is except for Sheri and her negativity. It wasn't so much about my bodily functions so much as, as you put it "trite, overused phrases". PERIOD!! Oh wait, isn't that one of your bodily functions?? I digress!
As for you Charlotte, mostly good, except you don't seem to know the value of what I bring to the table. One cent, that my friend, is a load of racehorse pee! BTW, you seem to know WAY too much about horse's pee habits! You've contributed one Peso to the cause. Congrats!!!
Brian, I am right there with Sheri. I really have never really had a desire to know about your bodily functions or anyone else's for that matter.
Anonymous, you too are not grasping the point of the rant! The whole "pee like a racehorse" thing is just a great example of the stupid phrases that come out of our mouths that make absolutely no sense! I think you and Sheri are just obsessed with bodily functions.
No, I don't think it's us Brian. WE aren't the ones who devoted a whole blog about racehorse pee. Anyway, I am BEYOND impressed with Charlotte & Laura. They certainly did their research unlike another blogger who shall (cough, Brian) remain nameless!
Actually, believe it or not, I did some research on the topic as well as the "for Pete's sake" but decided to roll with my rant anyway. It truly is amazing what you can google! I also am impressed with Laura. Charlotte, I'm not too sure about because it sounded less like research and more like first-hand knowledge.
Brian, type in pee like a racehorse at ask.com and I found that info in under a minute, but thanks.
Charlotte, it I didn't care...
I think it's interesting to find out where the phrases come from. I also think it's interesting that we use so many of them when we don't even know what they mean. Okay - so my comment isn't very interesting, but whatever. That's my nickel's worth. ha!
Who's Prism??? A Definite reward to whomever tells me the identity of Prism!
Nevermind, Kim wins!!!
You guys have waaaaaaay too much time on your hands!
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